What Did You Do Today Honey?

I dread the question at the end of each day from my husband…”What did you do today honey?”  I don’t think he understands how difficult that is to answer. 

When I was in corporate I couldn’t wait for him to come home and ask that question.  I could say how I interviewed 12 candidates, scheduled 8 candidates for second interviews, conducted new hire orientation, completed my weekly recruiting report which showed that I filled 10 positions last week, had lunch with my hiring managers, trained the new recruiter, and received another merit increase.

Saying I took  the kids to the library for story-time, checked out some books & movies, cleaned up the bathroom twice after the two year old tried to go potty by himself, mopped the floor several times because the kids kept spilling their cereal and milk on the kitchen floor, showed the kids how to take turns singing on the microphone since they all kept fighting over it, managed to get all the children to sleep at the same time for nap, took the kids to the playground and washed a load of laundry that I didn’t have time to fold just doesn’t seem as sexy.  I wish I could communicate what I do daily in quantifiable, measurable terms. 

My work as a mother doesn’t allow me the privilege of reporting results daily.  The result of my labor will unfold over a lifetime.


3 responses to “What Did You Do Today Honey?

  1. Maybe tell him to ask — What did you discover today? I am finding that because I spend the majority of the time with the kids and not my husband, that I am the one who will figure out how to handle the specific situations that come up with much more grace and ease. For example with our toddler, I can tell him how I have been avoiding power struggles and how we are getting through the routines of the day — like getting into the car seat — so that he can have the same success. I also find that being at home, away from the distractions of other adults, gives me more time to pray and seek the Lord’s direction for the family, so often I will know the next step we need to take, the next thing to buy or the next activity to add to the routine before he does. In the end what does telling him the tasks you have ticked off your to-do list mean? You are a part of research and development now. Give your husband a report about all you have discovered during the day when he was gone so that he can take that help and be a more effective parent and partner.
    Bring on the insights!

    • Thanks so much for your feedback. This is really a win/win approach. The question, What did you discover today, is much less intimidating than what did you do today. I can actually answer that question. It takes away the stress of feeling like I have to quantify what I’ve done, which is very difficult to do as a SAHM. Much of what we do can’t be measured in immediate, number oriented terms, but is still extremely important work. I will definitely bring on the insights!

  2. I think you accomplished a lot by leaving the house with your children in tow and coming back with all of them! You did this not once, but TWICE in one day. It takes courage to even think about travelling anywhere with small children!

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