The Underwear Drawer


We’ve been in the process of moving, which has motivated us to sort through and organize everything we own.  I had a wonderful time going through all the kid’s toys and remembering special moments when they played with each one.  Certain clothing items they’ve outgrown reminded me of precious times when they were smaller.  It also jolted me into the reality that they are growing up very fast. 

I was especially thrilled when I found some pre-baby pictures of myself.  “Wow, I was fabulous,” I thought as I browsed through each photo.  I examined every part of the young woman in those pictures.  Her smile was vibrant.  Her hair style perfectly accentuated her high cheek bones.  Everything about her posture declared, “I know who I am!”  I found myself daydreaming about the times  with my husband before the kids came along when I realized I had not started organizing the clothes in my bedroom.  I quickly put the pictures back in their proper place, but held onto my favorite so I could continue to reminisce as I headed to my room. 

“Where did all these clothes come from,” is what I asked myself as I approached what appeared to be a never ending closet full of clothes.  Since the closet was going to require more work than I thought, I decided to start with the dresser drawers.  It didn’t take long to organize the shirts, sweaters and pants inside and separate them by season.  I was happy with my progress and feeling pretty upbeat until I reached the drawer with all of my underwear. 

My intention was to group all the pieces together that were similar when I realized I only had one category…….BLOOMERS! As I continued to pull underwear out of the drawer it was apparent that there wasn’t a sexy pair anywhere that had been purchased or worn recently.  I felt like I was on the television show What Not to Wear…The Underwear Episode. What made things worse was when I caught a glimpse of the picture I was carrying around of the vibrant, young, pre-baby me.  It felt like the woman in that picture was now looking at me with disapproving eyes, as if she wanted to say….”please don’t tell me those are your underwear?”  She would never have approved of that hideous selection. 

What happened to all the cute pair I used to own?  I guess I hadn’t realized with each pregnancy, slowly but surely, the cute pair were replaced with the comfy BLOOMERS.  It was such a gradual change that I never noticed after four children, I didn’t have any cute undewear left.  That was a reality check I didn’t plan on having that day…..and for me, motherhood is no excuse to have a whole drawer full of BLOOMERS

Therefore, here are my MOM LAWS regarding underwear.

MOM LAWS REGARDING UNDERWEAR

  • For every BLOOMER there must be 5 pair of cute underwear
  • Only 20% of your underwear are allowed to be white, tan or black. (Get some colorful, fun underwear for a change.)
  • There must be at least 3 pair of underwear that have a saying on them (No, the tag doesn’t count.)
  • 80% of your bras must have a matching pair of panties (No mixing & matching.  Buy sets!!)
  • Underwear must be a separate line item in the monthly budget….next to getting your hair & nails done (If you don’t currently get your hair & nails done at least monthly…..START….you deserve it!)
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